My Granddad died in 2003.This was just the beginning.
In the late nineties he started researching a family story that had intrigued him from a young age. As a boy, he had been there to witness the affluent New York lawyers pulling up outside their modest Manchester home, in the "shiny black automobiles" and through family recollections he had the beginning threads of a story that down the generations has intrigued and warranted a progression of research.
I had initially helped my Granddad out in the early days, by typing up his handwritten notes onto a typewriter (yup-'typewriter' so I guess that dates the start of his project), so when he died, my Grandma gave me his folder of writings and having the 'shiny new internet' at my finger tips, I vowed to take some ownership and began where he left off.
Okay, so it's 2010, but I've worked all these years and picked this project up and down when and where able, I feel tardy with it, but for the last year I have made progress and great head way with where and what I should be doing with this story.
It appears that after a lot of research into technique and even more thought into what I want to portray, that a screenplay is the best way that I can pay service to the story. I figured this out sometime late last November, so although my attention has been on the story for some years, my focus is in relative infancy.
It's true: Wanting to write is like 'having homework for the rest of your life', because that it exactly what I have. But it isn’t like the homework that I had in school, this I want to complete. This homework I think about in my lunch hour, before I go to bed, when I get up, when I'm sat in stand-still traffic on the M6. Tiny thoughts sometimes, big brain aching conundrums at others.
So, forgive me that I talk about it, that I tweet about it, that I update my Facebook status about it; only I'm just a little bit passionate about it as a project.
I don't have a blind confidence in my writing abilities. In fact I have very little confidence at all.I just know, deep in my heart and in my every nerve and fibre that this; that this project could just be the reason for my being, and that gives me solace on even the darkest of days.
I talk to people at work, I talk to my family, I 'talk' to Twitter, and I 'talk' to Facebook about my progress' it's a ‘modern day diary’ of the ups and downs of my journey. Something that maybe-just may be of interest if and when I finish this screenplay and finally see it made for an audience to watch.
My Granddad would be so proud, so pleased with my progress on the research that he inspired me to carry out, and it is sad that he won't be here to see it in it's final film release (yes, I forever remain optimistic) But,I don't care how long this takes, how many revisions, how many scripts I have to go away and write and come back to; this - this will always be my first- The first tale that I wanted to tell. And so it has to be perfect in the end. Taking ‘No’ for an answer will not be an option; because I will not let it out of my care until it can truly take care of itself!
You've grasped my enthusiasm and I think you've sensed my passion, but what I guess I am questioning is whether or not - to those around me, that this is what is beginning to define me? I have wonderful, wonderful work colleagues who seem to gladly put up with my speedily delivered ideas and concepts on the project. When I realised the ending (which had taken four years to decide on) and excitedly pitched it to a friend, I was marvelled by the look in his eyes when I did. I saw this flash of wonder, this look that he seemed almost overwhelmed by my passion and excitement towards my revelations. I'll never forget that he gave me a look of 'consolidating agreement'. He looked straight into my eyes - His as wide as Mine.
With some people, I don’t get this response. Unfortunately it is from those, perhaps considered closest to me. I talk about the story, about my ideas about the progress I make and they are truly disinterested. I guess I have to grasp that not all people will find this 'their cup of tea', but am I wrong to think that this person should really be supporting me, really be listening, really be helping me?
I have channelled so much energy into this project that I do begin to think that I need a co-writer; not just from an ability angle but from the angle that perhaps I just need someone to talk to - to collaborate with. I know this is MY story; MY Granddad’s story, MY family's story, but as I want to share it with others, why not share my ideas with another and have them help guide it? Not having someone closer than family to share this with is perhaps what is making my thoughts meander. It is difficult to find someone to trust with what is in your head, heart and soul and for me - what is essentially my Granddad’s legacy.
So,until fresh ears refrain from perking up when I pitch this story, a 'project bore' I shall remain, and if I'm honnest, if it brings my dream to life: I'm not even sorry ;0
In the late nineties he started researching a family story that had intrigued him from a young age. As a boy, he had been there to witness the affluent New York lawyers pulling up outside their modest Manchester home, in the "shiny black automobiles" and through family recollections he had the beginning threads of a story that down the generations has intrigued and warranted a progression of research.
I had initially helped my Granddad out in the early days, by typing up his handwritten notes onto a typewriter (yup-'typewriter' so I guess that dates the start of his project), so when he died, my Grandma gave me his folder of writings and having the 'shiny new internet' at my finger tips, I vowed to take some ownership and began where he left off.
Okay, so it's 2010, but I've worked all these years and picked this project up and down when and where able, I feel tardy with it, but for the last year I have made progress and great head way with where and what I should be doing with this story.
It appears that after a lot of research into technique and even more thought into what I want to portray, that a screenplay is the best way that I can pay service to the story. I figured this out sometime late last November, so although my attention has been on the story for some years, my focus is in relative infancy.
It's true: Wanting to write is like 'having homework for the rest of your life', because that it exactly what I have. But it isn’t like the homework that I had in school, this I want to complete. This homework I think about in my lunch hour, before I go to bed, when I get up, when I'm sat in stand-still traffic on the M6. Tiny thoughts sometimes, big brain aching conundrums at others.
So, forgive me that I talk about it, that I tweet about it, that I update my Facebook status about it; only I'm just a little bit passionate about it as a project.
I don't have a blind confidence in my writing abilities. In fact I have very little confidence at all.I just know, deep in my heart and in my every nerve and fibre that this; that this project could just be the reason for my being, and that gives me solace on even the darkest of days.
I talk to people at work, I talk to my family, I 'talk' to Twitter, and I 'talk' to Facebook about my progress' it's a ‘modern day diary’ of the ups and downs of my journey. Something that maybe-just may be of interest if and when I finish this screenplay and finally see it made for an audience to watch.
My Granddad would be so proud, so pleased with my progress on the research that he inspired me to carry out, and it is sad that he won't be here to see it in it's final film release (yes, I forever remain optimistic) But,I don't care how long this takes, how many revisions, how many scripts I have to go away and write and come back to; this - this will always be my first- The first tale that I wanted to tell. And so it has to be perfect in the end. Taking ‘No’ for an answer will not be an option; because I will not let it out of my care until it can truly take care of itself!
You've grasped my enthusiasm and I think you've sensed my passion, but what I guess I am questioning is whether or not - to those around me, that this is what is beginning to define me? I have wonderful, wonderful work colleagues who seem to gladly put up with my speedily delivered ideas and concepts on the project. When I realised the ending (which had taken four years to decide on) and excitedly pitched it to a friend, I was marvelled by the look in his eyes when I did. I saw this flash of wonder, this look that he seemed almost overwhelmed by my passion and excitement towards my revelations. I'll never forget that he gave me a look of 'consolidating agreement'. He looked straight into my eyes - His as wide as Mine.
With some people, I don’t get this response. Unfortunately it is from those, perhaps considered closest to me. I talk about the story, about my ideas about the progress I make and they are truly disinterested. I guess I have to grasp that not all people will find this 'their cup of tea', but am I wrong to think that this person should really be supporting me, really be listening, really be helping me?
I have channelled so much energy into this project that I do begin to think that I need a co-writer; not just from an ability angle but from the angle that perhaps I just need someone to talk to - to collaborate with. I know this is MY story; MY Granddad’s story, MY family's story, but as I want to share it with others, why not share my ideas with another and have them help guide it? Not having someone closer than family to share this with is perhaps what is making my thoughts meander. It is difficult to find someone to trust with what is in your head, heart and soul and for me - what is essentially my Granddad’s legacy.
So,until fresh ears refrain from perking up when I pitch this story, a 'project bore' I shall remain, and if I'm honnest, if it brings my dream to life: I'm not even sorry ;0
